Junk food and spears; a poem by Andreas Blaustein

I’m eating junk food in the dark
I’m crying because I don’t feel
A multiplayer game is on
But I don’t wanna play it anymore
I need to fuck myself up
Because I don’t plan on surviving
An accident or a gun to the head
Whichever is fine by me
The spear is aged and dull
And I don’t see the point
I used to, but not right now

PewDiePie apology and ethos; a rhetorical analysis by Andreas Blaustein

Alright, so I’m not just a mediocre poet, I’m also a mediocre rhetorician! I study at university level to become a rhetorics consultant. So I thought I’d try to do some real lazy rhetorical analysis for you.

Ever heard of ethos? Sure you have. If you haven’t you suck. Anyway, ethos is what I will analyze today but first I will explain it a bit more. I will use the same understanding of ethos as Aristotle. When he wrote about ethos he wrote that it consists of three parts; fronesis (being a sensible or knowledgeable person), arete, (having good morals) and eunoia (good will towards the audience). A good character consists of these three things, meaning if you have these three things you have a good ethos. I’m explaining these things a bit lazy here but whatever, this is not an academic paper, it’s cooler.

So what exactly will I analyze? I will analyze PewDiePie’s apology video (link at the bottom). I’m sure most of you know what exactly I mean, but for those who don’t; in 2017 PewDiePie was live streaming while he was playing PUBG, a battle royale (last man standing game, like Fortnite), multiplayer shooting game. PewDiePie died in the game and got mad and said the n-word. He got a lot of backlash for it, but he quickly made a video apologizing for what he had done. There was still a lot of controversy around it, but he was still able to continue his career, still going strong as I am writing this in 2021.

What he did in the video was something very interesting. He was honest. He did not try to sugarcoat anything. My hypothesis is that his honesty might have saved his ethos. I hope that my analysis will make it clearer whether it was so or not.

I will point out and discuss the three parts of ethos being displayed in this apology video and then I will write my conclusion about PewDiePie’s ethos. So here we go!

Fronesis (being a sensible or knowledgeable person)
In the beginning of the video PewDiePie says that he is aware that other people use this word online. Later he says that this is not about him thinking he can do or say whatever he wants and get away with it.

Concerning what he said about people using this kind of language online; he knows it’s a problem. He wants to show that he has experience gaming online and that he knows that people use this language there a lot. It also seems like he wants to show that he thinks that other people who has made apology videos might have this attitude; that they can do whatever they want and get away with it. By doing this, PewDiePie might want to distance himself from that kind of behaviour and also show that he knows that that is also a problem.

Arete (having good morals)
PewDiePie says that the word slipped out in the heat of the moment and that he won’t make any excuses for it, because there are not excuses for it. He also mentions that it was the worst word he could think of. He later calls himself an idiot.

Here he shows that he knows what he said was wrong. He knows it is one of the worst words, indirectly stating that it is bad morals to use it. He wants to display here that he is aware of what is wrong and right, right being not using this kind of language. The fact that he calls himself an idiot (presumably because of the word he used, although that is not explicitly stated as he calls himself an idiot) shows that he thinks only idiots use words like these. That also means that he thinks that non-idiots do not use those words, because it is morally right since it hurts people to use it.

Eunoia (good will towards the audience)
At the end of his apology he says that he is sorry if he hurt or offended anyone by what he had done. He also says that he owes it to his audience to do better and he continues to say that he wants to improve and better himself not just for him, but also for anybody that looks up to him or is influenced by him.

This shows that PewDiePie is aware that he has a big influence because he has a big audience. He knows his mess-up have the potential to hurt a lot of people and he clearly states that he is regretful about it. He does not want to hurt anyone. The fact that he says he wants to improve and better himself also for the sake of his audience clearly shows that he wants to create a good will towards them. He wants them to feel happy watching his videos and not be hurt by them.

So to conclude, PewDiePie showed that he wants to do better for his audience, he knows what he did was wrong, even calling himself an idiot in the process, and he is aware of problems that is going on concerning the usage of the n-word in online gaming and also people who get backlash who simply try to get away without learning anything. That checks the boxes of euonoia, arete and fronesis respectively, meaning that this video created a good ethos by the Aristotelian definition.

That in itself does not mean that much though. My hypothesis for this tiny analysis was that it was the honesty of PewDiePie that was the fundamental reson that created a good ethos. I think that he calling himself an idiot was the key here. When people get backlash or get cancelled it is, according to my random speculations, because the majority of people don’t think that that person is worthy of being a public figure worthy to admire. Why isn’t that person worthy to admire? Not necessarily because that person has done something bad, but because that person is not aware that what they had done was bad. Instead they might try to make an apology simply to get away from the problem and continue their career. What PewDiePie did when he called himself an idiot was to show everyone else that he knew he had done something bad. He also showed he knew why it was bad, and that he was not trying to explain it away but rather show that he wants to be better (because who wants to be an idiot, right?). It’s a variation of what I call “the 8 Mile defense”. Remember in 8 Mile, in that last battle when (START OF SPOILER) Eminem said everything embarrassing about himself? And then Papa Doc had nothing to say, because Eminem had already dissed himself in every way possible? (END OF SPOILER) This is kind of what PewDiePie did, he showed that he knew he was an idiot which caused everyone else to go “Oh, okay, at least he knows what he did and he apologized for it. He’s at least somewhat good. Let’s move on”. Okay, not everyone said that, but I want to believe that they did because it’s way more dramatic and cool.

So to conclude even more, when you fuck up, show that you know that you fucked up. Don’t be afraid to call yourself bad names if you think that’s what you deserve, but also show that you know why the fuck up was bad. If you just call yourself bad names and then move on people will see through you, so the knowing why it was bad part is very important and usually very hard to fake. You just gotta have good morals for that. I know, it sucks. So don’t try to cheat, it won’t work and there are plenty of excellent examples of why (Travis Scott?), which I might analyze in the future.

PS! I know 8 Mile is an old movie by now and that people probably have seen it already, but I don’t care. I don’t want to spoil such a good movie for anyone ever. Come at me if you think I’m annoying for it.

Bias report
I am a fan of PewDiePie and that might have influenced this analysis

Some sad person being thankful; a rambling by Andreas Blaustein

You can click play on the Spotify player if you want to hear me read this post out loud

I don’t have many followers here on WordPress and I don’t have many posts or anything like that, but I like this place. Sometimes it feels like this is my place on the internet or something. That’s something important to me because I’ve always felt more or less malplaced in this world.

I’ve tried many times to do something with this blog and it never quite worked. At first I tried to write stories here and make this some kind of storywriting blog. For some reason it did not fit me. Then I tried to be some funny blogger. It was my most successful time (successful in very small terms) but that didn’t fit me either. Then I tried to post my poems on here, but I never truly liked my poems, so I stopped. Now I’m posting my poems here again but something feels different. I like my poems more for one thing, but I also like this community more, even though I barely have a community here.

I guess that the people who like my posts now are writers that write stuff that for some reason fit me better. Or maybe I understand it better now, I don’t know. It’s just fun to read your stuff. By the way, there are some people who liked my older poems who write stuff I’ve always liked and I think they know who they are.

There are other places that might be better for me “career wise”. I don’t have a career but I feel like if I want to have one, I should be on Twitter and Instagram and Reddit, creating a following. Those places have a big reach, many users and lots of potential, but I just hate it there most of the time.

The best place to be is where you like it. Someplace you know you’ll come back to. I feel like the WordPress community might be that place for me.

This is place is full of respectable, kind and interesting people. This place does not shut down my account for no reason several times without giving any information as to why I’m being shut down or how to appeal that decision (thanks Instagram and Facebook!) This place is small, cozy, welcoming and just… a very nice place to be.

So when you like or comment on any of my posts, I would just like to say thank you. Thank you for stopping by. It warms my heart and it makes me feel at home.

The world ain’t so bad here.

TV light; a poem by Andreas Blaustein

During the night is when the nothingness comes
There’s nobody there to be with me except the TV light
Sometimes video games, sometimes a movie or a show
Whatever it is, imitation of life
Not life itself
A TV won’t talk to you, a TV won’t touch you
I guess I need those so called ‘people’ I’ve heard so much about

Here’s me reading my poem

Hope you enjoyed the poem and the reading of the poem. Stay away from those TV lights and people and everything all together and you’ll be fine, I think

Bear sleep; a poem by Andreas Blaustein

Those damn bears
I envy them so damn much
They sleep through winter like I wanna sleep through life
Or at least a few years of life
I’d sleep a few years and then I’d come back to see if the world is still fucked up and if I can deal with it
Otherwise; a few more years of blessed sleep
I’d keep going like this until I either become happy or just… die
Best I can do right now is go to sleep for twelve hours, so that’s what I’ll do

Click play to hear me read the poem

Let me know if you would like to sleep for twelve hours also, I’d love to hear about it!

Going home; a poem by Andreas Blaustein

I can’t go home because I know
when I come home it will begin the end
The moments fly into a cage of memory
and there it stays and never grows anymore
I’ll sit and think and I will be blind
as life is being lived by someone else
Moments end and life continues forth
This life is moving, I can feel it moving
It fucking hurts, but now I’m going home

Click play to here me read the poem out loud

Something about a guide; a poem by Andreas Blaustein

I’m looking for answers on the internet but I only find information
Religious people, they pray to their gods and they feel better
I can’t pray to any of the gods to feel better
I wish there was one single definite guide to life
Imagine always having an answer to your every question
We don’t have that and I guess that’s something kind of good
But sometimes I want that stupid guide in my hands

Hear me read the poem out loud here:

Nights, sleep and money; a poem by Andreas Blaustein

I love to go to sleep when everybody else are beginning to wake up
During the night everything shuts the fuck up
That’s when I can think again
And breathe
Weeknights are best
That’s when it’s the most quiet
This is why I need to get rich
So I can go to sleep in my own time
And be rid of this fucking social jetlag

Click this link to hear me read the poem: https://open.spotify.com/episode/7u3F4dGcgwQpvNdc2ObgF0?si=rBqZPAqDR_28ZxlKjx-_mw&utm_source=copy-link